Sharing with you my favorite excerpts from Fyodor Dostoyevsky’s Notes from Underground*--there’s so much wisdom in these lines worth pondering.
In every man’s memory there are things he won’t reveal to others, except, perhaps, to friends. And there are things he won’t even reveal to friends, only, perhaps, to himself, and then, too, in secret. And finally, there are things he is afraid to reveal even to himself, and every decent man has quite an accumulation of them.*****
People like to count only their troubles, not the good things in their lives. If they looked properly, they’d see that everybody has his share of happiness allotted to him.
*****
Love is God’s mystery and should be hidden from outsider’s eyes, whatever happens. This makes it holier, better. The husband and wife respect each other more, and a great deal is founded on respect And if there has been love, if they are married for love, why should love cease? Isn’t it possible to keep it alive? It is a rare case when it’s impossible. Besides, if the husband is a kind and honest man, how can love pass? It’s true, the feeling of the early married days will pass, but the love that will come afterwards will be still better. Man and wife will grow close in spirit; they’ll share in common all their doings, they’ll have no secrets from each other. And when children start coming, the hardest times will seem happy, so long as there is love and courage. Work goes like a song, and even if you have to deny yourself a piece of bread once in a while for your children’s sake, life’s full of joy all the same. After all, they’ll love you for it afterwards; so that you’re really saving for your own future.
The children start growing up, and you feel that you are setting an example for them; that even when you die, they’ll carry your thoughts and feelings inside them all their lives, for you’ve bequeathed them of your image, and they will grow up in your likeness. So you see, this is a great duty, and how can the mother and father help but get closer? Some people say it is a hardship to have children. But who says so? It’s a joy from heaven!
*Translated by Mirra Ginsburg
